Tuesday, June 22, 2010

Will you accept this rose?

I have always been a fan of the television show "The Bachelor." I remember when Season 1 began and we were introduced to a new variety of reality tv. The entertainment that comes from a group of women desperately hoping to be offered a rose and a proposal somewhere down the line makes great television.

The Bachelor has led to its spin-off show The Bachelorette but I'm not as much of a fan. Something about the male contestants always makes me sad, especially when they are not offered a rose. The men usually cry, confess how they were falling for Bachelorette X, & how desperately they want to find true love. However, this season of The Bachelorette has been good to me by introducing many more questionably stable men than usual. There was the Weatherman who always appeared to be on the verge of tears. Justin "Rated R" Rego, the entertainment wrestler who has already been painted the shows villain. And then there is Casey, who has made me hide my face in embarrassment numerous times this season. For one, Casey uncomfortably provided Ali with a tone deaf serenade following their helicopter ride, and once again at a museum. Confused & I'm sure questioning his sanity, Ali told Casey that he needed to be himself, and instead of making contrived, over the top gestures, to act natural. So what did Casey go out and do? He got a GIANT tattoo on his wrist to prove his adoration to Ali and to have a permanent reminder of her for his entire life. A tattoo symbolizing love is pretty much the kiss of death, so naturally, Casey was sent home last night. His departure will take away much of the shows cringe worthy moments but I think it's best he leave before permanent damage takes place. Oh wait, he got a tattoo... I do hope that he finds love someday, if not some good medication.

Although this season of The Bachelorette has been slightly more entertaining than usual, I still think the truest form of entertainment takes place on The Bachelor. It is here that the majority of contestants are unstable and have Casey-esque qualities. There are always a handle of women who come in on day one, pull the bachelor aside, and makes statements like, "you have no idea how much I want to get married & have kids. I'm not getting any younger." Yes, pretty much every woman internally feels that way at a certain stage in their life, but it is not necessarily a good idea to blurt that out on day one. I mean don't these women know by now that The Bachelor is simply a middle aged frat-boy who wants to be on television, go on free vacations, and see how many contestants he can get into the hot tub? Almost none of these couples work out. Which brings me to today's story...

The Bachelor's Jake & Vienna have broken up. Shocking.


We all knew these two were never going to work out. I mean Jake was an ex Soap Opera star who then became a Pilot (probably only for the outfits if you know what I'm saying), went onto The Bachelor, and then had a brief stint on Dancing With the Stars (probably only for the outfits). This guy has fame-whore practically written across his forehead. When Jake got down to the final two and it was between Tenley: the psychotic, neurotic, divorcee, ballet dancer, or Vienna: the tattooed, ex-hooters waitress, who was pretty much hated by every other woman on the show, I knew this guy had no intentions on getting married. So today when I learned they had split I was just about as shocked as when I learned Larry Kings wife had an affair. I think anyone who hopes for these couples to work out is delusional. I don't think you can go out looking for love, especially on a television show. You have to have a natural and immediate chemistry with someone. There is no way that the Bachelor or Bachelorette for that matter doesn't know from day 1 who the final 2 are going to be. But in the meantime, it sure is entertaining to watch.